Dating in the 21st century is supposed to be easy, but it’s actually more complicated than ever. Our parents – and their parents before them, met people face to face before they spoke to them using any other method. They got to see the appearance of a potential date as they really looked, without any filters being applied. They got to hear the sound of their voice, and establish an impression of what they’re like as a person.
The current generation of singletons has no such luck. We’re reduced to exchanging words on a screen with someone who may or may not be what they claim to be, and may or may not be constructing a completely false identity with which to take advantage of us. Various editorials have been written about whether Tinder (and dating apps like it) are actually doing more harm than good when it comes to our mental health. What’s supposed to be a convenient app can actually be quite draining.
As well as questioning the impact of the app on our mental health, some people have compared to the swiping mechanism of the date-matching software to slot games. There might be something to say for the comparison; especially since slot games are now available on our phones as mobile slots. In both cases, you’re repeating the same action over and over again, hoping you’ll eventually get a positive result in the end. In mobile slots, the positive result is a financial windfall. With a dating app, the positive result is a match. Most users of Vegas Slots websites know when to stop, though; they’ll have an affordability limit, and they’ll stop when they’ve hit it. With Tinder, if you’re paying for the premium features, you can just carry on swiping forever.
Instead of just blindly swiping right on everyone – which is a tactic that makes us wince every time we see someone do it – we might all enjoy the process a lot more if we could all agree that there are some profiles that should just be left alone. These are the Tinder profiles you should steer clear of.
Profiles With No Bio
This includes people who have the most beautiful face you’ve ever seen, we’re afraid to say. Someone who thinks their face can do all the talking for them probably doesn’t have all that much to say. You can fall in love with someone’s face for a short while, but after the honeymoon period is over, you’re going to want to have a decent conversational partner. Someone who doesn’t think the bio section of Tinder isn’t worth filling out likely isn’t going to fulfill that need for you. There’s also the risk that they’re an egomaniac; filling out personal information is beneath them, because they’re so good looking they can do what they like.
Profiles With Too Much Bio
Just as a profile with no bio is a bad thing, so is a profile with a bio that doesn’t end. The ideal Tinder (or dating app) bio is one which leaves you wanting more. It’s like a movie trailer, or the back cover of a good book. It should give you a sense of who this person is, but not so much information that you don’t know what to do with it. What are you going to talk about on your first date when you know all there is to know? People who don’t know when to stop on their bio are generally self-obsessed, and will talk about themselves endlessly when you meet. They love the sound of their own voice.
People With No Face
We’ve all see these profiles. They’re the ones which have an exciting, well-written bio, but no facial pictures. You might get a silhouette image, or a picture of a body, but no identifying marks at all. There is always a reason for this. If you pay close attention to the text of the bio, you’ll usually see the word ‘discreet’ appear at some point. These people are cheats, and they’re not showing their face because they don’t want to get caught. They’re the people who will eventually end up on articles about people who got caught cheating on Tinder. There’s no legitimate reason not to show people your face on a dating app, and therefore there’s no valid reason for you to start talking to them.
Anyone Who Mentions ‘The University Of Life’
You can also add ‘the university of hard knocks’ to this. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not going to higher education. If you managed to make in life without going to university, congratulations to you. People who’ve done great things with no degree can never write things like this in their profiles (or anywhere else), though. Anyone who uses these phrases is proud that they’re uneducated, and they almost certainly sneer at people who are. They tend to be dullards. They’re almost certainly people you don’t want to start a long term relationship with.
The Demanding Ones
The demanding people on Tinder are the ones who write things like ‘don’t swipe right if you’re a timewaster,’ or ‘don’t swipe right if you don’t want to meet me.’ That isn’t their decision to make. Only a complete maniac would agree to meet someone without having a conversation with them first. You have no way of knowing whether or not you’re wasting each other’s time until you’ve had a conversation, either. Nobody has the right to put restrictions like this on you before you’ve even said hello. It just screams ‘I’m controlling,’ and that isn’t a trait nobody should ever want in a partner. Give them a wide berth and let some other poor fools fall for it.
By implementing all of the above, we think you can eliminate more than 25% of all the regrettable matches you make on the app. That means less wasted time on conversations that go nowhere, and more time spent going on dates with people who might ultimately mean something to you much further down the line. Suddenly, the whole experience feels a lot less draining. We might even start enjoying using the app again!
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